January 8th

Now while this day probably does not signify anything to you (well, unless it is your birthday), today marks a year of being diagnosed with Diabetes Type 1 for me.  This isn’t some crazy, huge monumental day for me, but it is neat to reflect on what all has happened this year.  It has been quite a journey.  Literally there have been more big decisions, changes in direction, and surprises in this year than I ever would have thought possible.  Something that I have had to sit on a whole lot, is that the Lord will never give us more than we can handle.  Never.

I could probably write a whole novel for you on this year, but I know that no one would read more than maybe one or two pages worth…so I will spare you of the novel and just let you in on some of the the surprises and some of the things that I have learned in regards to diabetes specifically.

In this past year…

-I weighed as much as I probably did in seventh grade (and now I will just say that I don’t any more).
-I lost probably a third of the hair on my head (never knew how much this could mess with your identity until I experienced it), and I gained it back.
-Learned how to count carbs (through studying and trial and error) and do count every carb I eat.
-Started checking my blood glucose several times a day.
-Learned what it means to give myself grace when my blood glucose is high or low, or if I eat something every now and then that I “shouldn’t.”
-Learned how to give myself shots of insulin.
-Learned how to give myself insulin several times a day.
-Learned what hypoglycemia is by experience.
-Learned what hyperglycemia is by experience.
-Got diagnosed with hypothyroidism.
-Learned how to say no to foods, ect.
-Learned how to say no in life in general.
-Learned how to plan ahead for meals, exercise, and insulin dosage related to these things.
-Learned discipline in life in general.
-Learned why people get frustrated with diabetes, because as my diabetes educator says, “Diabetes is like a full-time job that you didn’t sign up for, that you never get a day off from, and that you can never quit.”
-Learned how to not let diabetes govern my life and steal my joy.
-Started using an insulin pump.
-Learned how much better a pump is than needles.
-Leaned how much it costs to be diabetic (I mean, wow).
-Learned how difficult health insurance companies can be and how much they just don’t want to pay for things.
-Have had to learn forgiveness, love, grace, and kindness toward health insurance and the people I have talked to.
-Have at least some understanding of how much medical expenses can cost for people in general.
-Have seen how much this disease has affected my family.
-Sympathize with caretakers more that I ever have before in my life.
-Have experienced what it is like to be in a medical trial.
-Gotten two picc lines.
-I have been in the doctors office for literally 5-6 weeks this year.
-Have been blessed to see how kind and gracious doctors and nurses can be.
-Would call a lot of people in my doctor’s office friends.
-Have experienced constant love, support, and concern from my friends.
-Have learned what it means to trust God in this and to know that some how this is shaping me and is for HIS GLORY.

I could list more, but as you can see, the list has already gotten quite long (sorry!)…

One thing that I have never been so excited about before in my life is knowing that one day I WILL RECEIVE a perfect and new body.  I have understood more than ever that this world is not our home.  I know that Jesus has endured SO MUCH MORE than you or I.  That He sympathizes with us in our suffering.  That He is near to us.  We are called to cast our burdens on Him.  For He cares for us. I have actually grown to be thankful for this disease. Why? Because I have to rely on God every day. In big things and in small things. This is one way I carry my cross everyday. One way I can glorify God and lift Him up everyday. One way I can persevere and endure the race.

So to Him be all the glory and honor and praise forever and ever.